HURRICANE BREAKING NEWS!

WE’RE HAVING A HURRICANE!

This is Super Kitty bringing you the latest breaking news on Hurricane Irene. It is 3:25 PM and we still have electricity! Lake Patrick behind me has breached its banks. The grapes are flooded and soon the onions will be history!

Here’s Lake Patrick. The mulch is on it’s way to the front yard. 

There are branches coming down from the maple tree. Mom brought us all outside because there was finally a let up in the rain (six inches so far) and the puppies had to pee. They don’t get to pee in the house like Makamae and I do. Dogs, they just don’t know how to negotiate the perks!
It was a quick trip though and we were back in the house.

Stuck in the house.


May as well get some TLC from my big brother Comet. He is a good brother.


Then spend some quality time with Makamae. She has to do the “I’m so cute” crap. Mom’s a pushover for it though. That is a good thing for all you kitties out there to remember. Cute = Puppet Master.

Look at that; giving Mom the half squint ooh I love you eyes. Behind my back no less. Makes me look bad. I’m going to say hi to Kea’we.

 
Kea’we is such a good listener, even if she would carry me around the house by my neck. Now I have to get back to my hurricane coverage. So hopefully I’ll have more pictures later if I’m not blown away.
By the way my dakine fashion raincoat is courtesy of Ziplock Freezer Gallon. I’m sure the ZFG logo is trademarked.

Mom’s Paws

 
Today I’d like to talk about Mom’s Paws. She’s  not here so I can say anything I want…. Her Paws Are Gigantic! Plus you humans have to know how it gives us furries the big eyes when we see your furless skin. It isn’t natural. Dad takes most of the fur off of his face and Mom takes all of the fur off of her legs. Brr, don’t human’s all know how much more attractive they’d be as a soft  Grey, Calico, Tortoise Shell or of course Orange Tabby?
 
People paws just aren’t as functional as our paws. We jump, climb, shred the couch – all in a days work! Our paws do fine. Ever hear humans walk barefoot? Hilarious! I wish I could imitate the sounds people make… Auwe! Auwe! Auwe!  Or Ow! Ow! Ow!  Just go to the beach on any hot sunny day and watch someone go across the sand barefoot. Their arms go up and they lift their legs extra high then they do a dance across the sand yelling “ooh’s”, “oowww’s”, and sometimes words Mom won’t let me say! I promise you’ll laugh ‘til your tummy hurts. Just look at Dad’s paws here, all tender.
 
As you can see Mom wears shoes out. If she likes them when they fall apart she puts them back together with Liquid Nails and clamps or Gorilla Glue. How do the make nails liquid anyway? And if they are liquid how do they hold stuff together? Wouldn’t screws work better?
Mom was mad at the Shoe Balance company because that gray pair of shoes was only worn 10 times when the side blew out during the Kona Marathon. What Mom needs is a Shoe Sponsor! So Companies like New Balance, Avia, or Rockridge can send applications to to my e-mail address….Oops, I don’t have one. Anyway they can contact me here. Companies like Jimmy Choo, Ferragamo  or Manolo need not apply! This is my best idea ever!!!

Here’s what I mean. Mom likes hiking shoes.           

Not these boots. Hey, I’m Puss In Boots! OK Boot. I need a sword! I find this kind of cozy myself.  

Mom has other shoes she likes to walk in, she loves these.
But she doesn’t ever wear this kind to go out hiking or walking. I’m not sure why. They sure look airy and cool.
Next time we have snow I’m going to pretend I’m sledding! Whee! Wheee!!!
OK , A sponsor would need Mom’s shoe size. I don’t understand shoe sizes. I think Mom wears a 38 um D. Uh Hmm, Oh maybe that is bra size. Hmm, yeah that is bra size but that is the size Dad wishes Mom’s bras were. Huh. Tonight when Dad leaves his laptop I’ll go on Amazon and add 38D’s to his “Wish List” Mom and Dad will be sooo proud of me!  Shoe sizes and Bra sizes are so similar. I wonder if women have something like that thing that measures their paws at the shoe store to measure their breasts. Do they buy bras by length and width? Mom likes a wide shoe. I wonder if they make a 38W.  I’m a free spirit, they will Never make me wear a bra!
 
I’m going to have to look at Mom’s shoes.
Wow, Mom wears Men’s shoes! That is OK, when no one is looking I eat dog food. It is yummy. Bonus it makes Kea’we mad! Oh, good times!


Told you she had HUGE PAWS! I’d better be nice to Mom she has paws like Godzilla! Ahhh, Screaming Army guys running as the great gray doom descends upon… Nothing can help you now…. Ahhhh!  Momzilla! Noooo!
Does anyone know…. Is this stuff really made out of Gorillas?

Mom just saw my post!!!! I’m in big trouble!!! 
Mom’s face is red and she is mumbling about “Yeah my feet are big, but I don’t have small breasts!”  Then something about a sea not being exactly a pancake. I'm confused and I don’t think I’ll be getting any treats tonight.